Dear Journal,

I only started this journal because I'm starting my first experiments today.

I'll try two, just to start off.

The first experiment shall be about an animal. This experiment is one that

will help a Squartnib (an animal on intergalactic) to talk and be as intelligent

as an Alien or Martian.

The second experiment will teach a rinoasaur (an animal) how to eat, using

forks, knives, spoons, and even chopsticks (this one's going to be hard).

I shall start these experiments as soon as possible, as in, right now.

Dear Journal,

I'm about to start on my Squartnib experiment. I will call this experiment, E1,

for experiment number 1. I have a Squartnib in a cage, right here, and I'm

going to hand him a banana and see what he does.

That was, well, it didn't go as I hoped it would. Well then, let me see. Ah why don't

we try and see what he does with a CD.

Well then. I guess we've proved that he's, how do I put this, unintelligent.

Well, I think it's time we start on the other experiment.

Dear Journal,

This Experiment will further be called E2, for it's the second experiment. Okay,

this rinoasaur will sit down in this chair, and will eat the green feas, a.k.a moon

noodles, using the folks and spoons we found on a smaller planet call EARTH.

Or then again, maybe not. Okay, let's try another approach.

Oh, my goodness, That is just, disgusting. Oh dear. Well, I guess I'll try these

experiments further tomorrow. Until we meet again, good bye.

GoHome