AESTHERAE, Spills her mind


To Ann Angel

Everything is the same as it was

When you were my starry eyed

Peaceful and contented babe.

It is still loud, chaotic, fast and mad

Troubling and qarrelsome, yes, everywhere


Not in your eyes, not in your mind, not in your heart.


Everything is still the same as it was in a heaven of bliss


God is the same, yesterday, today and forever


We are one with God


Know, look, expect, hope with a raw hope, and






1. Wait with me, I'm camping here too, we are together, never apart. There is a path before us, sometimes we climb trees and ford rivers, but we know where we are going. We have to be someplace every minute.

2. It's ok to take as you like sitting by, watching.

3. When something needs to change, you'll know. Everything will change. When you were a baby, you described trouble and change in a phrase,"The wind is blowing." If the wind is blowing too hard, get out of the storm. Wait till it passes over, then work at it, do all your work for God. Look to Him at the start. Every task is a mission because small things are often great, like a baby, like a premature baby, therefore take care of the small stuff.

4. If you find the task of your life early, that is a mission and a life sustaining blessing. I don't know how others come by their life's mission. Most people call it by some other name, like motherhood, doctor, nurse, artist, etc. but getting your path in life___ it is individual and secret and hard to explain entirely in terms of logic and custom. I do know that it does come,as a great blessing if you look to God and ask, in word or in need. The answer will come into your heart , you'll have it, a true calling, a path to walk in life where you'll be guided and empowered, and fulfilled. I think this is the most important camping skill that you'll need.

5. Sometimes, everyone; and always, someone, somewhere, loses it. I've been there; so have you. Just look to God, wait for Him. He sees you too and He is seeking you for your good, like your best beloved friend-Mom - Dad-Home. Seek Him like the Buddhist seeking chant , "Om Mane Padme Hume "which for me always sounded like "O, Mamma Papa Home" We are all global, intergalactic campers, forward looking toward a home too good. Therefore don't follow any other way while you are here camping out. Drugs, sex, fame, riches, glamour, other people or other religions....can get you lost......but, follow God and you will be at peace, respected, and taken care of with the abundance of all good things. To get home, you have to learn to keep flying in the right direction.

6. So learn to fly above the landscape, above the tree line and beyond, and keep going, beyond yourself, the world, the busymess, other times, dimensions, imaginings. Everything can and will try to get you down, but you are at the controls, and God is your co-pilot, so go for it and don't worry, you will not crash, get over that fear,but stay in control. Don't try drugs or alcohol to get high, but if you do, know that you give up your control to something that will let you down, hard. You have enough lift without it anyway. There is no substitute for sober life, as honest as it gets and make that better as you are able and with God's help.

7. Make life better little by little as you are able and with God's help. Make someone else's life better and you will have doubled better for yourself. This also is the most important best camping rule. It never fails to rule:' Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.'

8. You are my little girl; be wise about little boys. Big rule here. This is the number, who knows, rule of keeping control of your own destiny as an intergalactic, flying high, superhero, so go very carefully here: Have fun, enjoy being a beautiful flower, let them look, sniff, but don't let them pluck up roots and all. Save your best for the one God will bring your way. Just like your life's mission, ask God and He will answer the prayer of your heart. Expect a soul mate, the one you cannot imagine being without, the reason for your songs, the joy of your life and give yourself freely to this one, only. To miss this point is heart breaking. Boys will come along, you may think this boy is the one, no that one, but then you will lose sometime. Getting dumped, it happens to nearly everyone, but that is not really heartbreak. That will get better, and it is for the better, because the real love of your life is still out there, God doesn't fail you, He will bring the best one for you, probably in a very interesting way, don't ask. The real heartbreak about love is losing God's best, your own self respect and the will to carry the weary burdens of mistakes manifested, or inconvenient babies. Therefore, no sex before the right one shows up and God sanctifies your vow to each other. Holiness never fails.

9. Do you know who you are. Do you know who I am. Do you know who God is. Well don't let anybody tell you anything less. Put God first in your life, others second and then yourself, you will have a great and beautiful life and be glad all of your days.

10. About giving and taking and having it all: It's all here now, you have all you need, so give freely, it has to come back....that's a rule too. If you take what is not yours, someone is going to cry, and tell on you. God will hear, so save yourself a lot of grief, do no one any harm at all, ever. Wars, fights, brawls, all this will happen and this is why; someone is harming and taking from someone else, someone is or imagines that they are wronged. Justice means it is very ok to set wrong things right, but be sure you are on the truth side of the fight if you happen into a situation. The truth never loses forever. Forever is the most important thing to know about camping. Remember forever. It's long. You are going to need a best friend. I only know one, who hasn't......let me down; Jesus.



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